Valentine's Day: A Celebration of Self-Love

Valentine's Day is here again - You are single, just broken up, on your own for what feels like forever, looking for love – whatever your situation may be; you look around and everyone has their sweetheart and you don’t.

They are celebrating, getting flowers, having a special meal, getting a gift, and looking entirely too happy on your social media feed. Valentine’s Day is a strong reminder of how single you are, right?

It doesn’t have to be!

Valentine's Day doesn't have to be a race to find romantic love; it can be a celebration of all forms of love, including self-love. Celebrating ourselves and our relationships with friends, family, and even nature can be just as fulfilling.

Despite some interesting origins of this day, Valentine’s Day continues to evolve. Ultimately it is a day about embracing love of many different types. It’s about realizing the things you have to celebrate in your life – single or taken.

Valentine's Day has a rich and fascinating history that spans centuries. It is believed to have originated from both ancient Roman and Christian traditions. One popular legend is that of St. Valentine, a priest who defied Emperor Claudius II's decree that young men shall remain single to be better soldiers.

Valentine continued to perform secret marriages for young lovers, and when his actions were discovered, he was executed on February 14th.

Another theory suggests that Valentine's Day has its roots in the ancient Roman fertility festival called Lupercalia, celebrated from February 13th to 15th. This festival involved rituals to purify the city and promote health and fertility. Over time, the festival was Christianized, and the celebration of St. Valentine's Day was established on February 14th.

The association of Valentine's Day with romantic love began in the Middle Ages, particularly with the works of Geoffrey Chaucer. His poem "Parlement of Foules" (1382) is often cited as the first to link the day with romantic love. By the 15th century, it had become common for people to exchange love notes and small gifts.

Today, Valentine's Day is celebrated worldwide with the exchange of cards, flowers, chocolates, and other gifts. It has become a commercial holiday, with many businesses capitalizing on the occasion to promote romantic gestures.

It is time to continue the evolution of the day of love and start a new tradition - celebrating the most important person in your life…

You!

Fall in love with yourself! How can you truly love anyone else if you don’t love yourself entirely first? And why should you let mass consumerism, a construct solely built on the idea of exploding profits, make you feel bad for spending this beautiful holiday without a romantic interest?

The History of Valentine’s Day

The Evolution of Love

Way back when I was in elementary school, we spent weeks in art class making valentine ‘boxes’ to hold the various handmade cards we made for all our classmates.

We also made them for our families at home. Some might make a card for someone special, a secret valentine, who could be a best friend or someone you ‘liked’ at the age of 6 or 8.

We were excited about those little candy conversation hearts with cute sayings like “be mine”. It was about letting people know you love them, not gifts and expensive cards. Romantic love was just a small part of the day.

In the last several decades, social and psychological sciences have made significant strides in understanding human connection and love.

Living in a world increasingly brought together by technology rather than human face-to-face contact along with the myriad distractions of modern life, it has become essential to actively work on maintaining strong and vital connections.

Healthy love for a partner requires more than mere attraction or a warm feeling in the heart. It involves compromise and a give-and-take dynamic, which can only be achieved when you have a solid understanding of yourself. Becoming a whole person, giving from one's abundance, trusting oneself, and knowing that one is enough are crucial elements of a successful relationship.

Choosing to be with a partner every day, even during challenging times, needs to be a conscious decision rather than falling into a situation that may not be fully enjoyable, or even unhealthy for you.

For those who are currently single, this period presents an opportunity for self-discovery and growth. Instead of feeling pressured to find a special someone, it's important to recognize that the most special person is yourself.

Falling in love with yourself might be perceived as selfish, but when it stems from a place of growth and overflowing abundance, it enables individuals to flourish and spread love to others. This Valentine's Day, take time for self-reflection and self-care.

Whether it's a walk in nature, engaging in a creative activity, writing a love letter to yourself, taking a warm bath, or cuddling up with a good book, finding activities that nurture the soul is essential.

True self-love involves knowing one's limits, setting good boundaries, and allowing others to follow their own paths. By taking care of yourself, you become healthy enough to love and nurture those around you, aligning with your soul and guiding you toward fulfillment.

The Different Types of Love

Love is not confined to romantic relationships; it extends to family, friends, humanity, pets, and the beauty of nature. It is an ancient language that is difficult to define. Reflecting on one's own definition of love, considering the different levels or types of love, and understanding what they mean to oneself can provide valuable insights.

When meeting someone new, it's possible to discern if they love themselves, have high or low self-esteem, or self-worth.

It raises important questions:

• Can one truly love oneself if they don't think well of themselves?

• Can one love others if they don't love themselves or feel good about themselves?

• Can one give others what they don't give to themselves?

Ultimately, choosing happiness and rewiring the brain to notice what is present rather than what is lacking can lead to a fulfilling life. Taking a pause to reflect on these questions can help you live a life you can look back on with satisfaction.

Falling in love with yourself is indeed a powerful concept, and it’s definitely not selfish. Instead, it builds a healthy foundation to share genuine love with others. Creating a practice of self-love can be as simple as:

• Writing yourself a love letter: Reflect on your strengths and achievements.

• Engaging in a hobby: Whether it's painting, writing, or any other creative endeavor that brings you joy.

• Mindful walks in nature: Connect with the natural world and experience the incredibly soothing benefits.

• Pampering yourself: Take a warm bath, enjoy your favorite book, or simply relax.

True self-love is about setting healthy boundaries and respecting both your own and others' paths in life. This allows us to be more present, supportive, and caring to those around us. It’s beautiful to consider the different types of love and how they enrich our lives in diverse ways.

So this Valentine’s Day, let’s redefine it together. Embrace the love within yourself and celebrate the myriad forms of love that fill your life. What's one thing you'll do to nurture yourself today?

Self Love Ideas

Here are some wonderful activities you can do to embrace self-love and connection:

• Self-Love Practices

  • Have a self-spa day

  • Buy yourself something special

  • Take a walk in nature

  • Write yourself a love letter

  • Keep it simple and be in the stillness

  • Dress up and make yourself a special dinner

• Connecting with Others

  • Get together with other single friends

  • Make it about non-romantic love

  • Surprise a family member with a gesture

  • Give valentines to people you meet throughout the day, including the homeless

  • Go out and sit with someone else who is sitting alone

• Reflecting on Connection

  • Consider what connection means to you

  • Recognize that connecting with like-minded people makes you feel full

  • Acknowledge that you can be in a room full of people and still feel disconnected

  • Understand that connecting with yourself is key to connecting with others

Taking these steps can help you foster a sense of self-love and build meaningful connections with others. Enjoy the journey of self-discovery and spreading love this Valentine’s Day and every day after!

Ready to prioritize yourself and build the life you deserve?

Book a free 30-minute illumination call and let's create an action plan so you can experience the self-love and abundance you've always wanted!