Life School: From Surviving to Thriving

You are Meant for More

I remember this day like it was yesterday.

Just over 15 years ago, I remember getting a phone call from my dad late in the afternoon. The greeting seemed normal, until he went on to tell me how my mom had an advanced stage of melanoma.

He explained that she was scheduled for surgery the next day, with immunotherapy treatments soon to follow. It was going to be a long road ahead for her.

At the time, I was already in a dark place in my own life both personally and professionally. I did not like my job. I hated driving to work in the morning. I was in an unhealthy, toxic relationship. I felt lonely and disconnected from everything.

Therefore, when I got that phone call from my dad, it felt like my world was caving in on me

After a long stretch of despair and defeat, things started to click. I learned very quickly how to be mentally strong and work through it. I started to ask questions and look to people who were living happy, successful lives.

I didn’t realize it at the time but I started to understand that it’s not about having problems - problems are inevitable - it is about how we deal with and plan for our problems. That is what makes all of the difference.

And THAT is what separates us from surviving to thriving.

The Journey to Understanding

It has taken me almost 40 years to completely understand the fact that during our relatively short time on earth, we were meant to have problems.

And through these challenges is how we grow and evolve - IF we choose a growth mindset that is.

Sure, we experience joy and happiness, and that is great, but having problems is a sign of life. I’ve come to the reality that if you are breathing, you have problems. Nobody is excluded.

A famous quote by Norman Vincent Peale said “The only people who don’t have problems are in a cemetery”. Unfortunately, too many people let their problems control their life and they never really develop a true sense of purpose and happiness.

I don't know about you, but some of my most challenging situations turned out to shape me for the better. These shaping moments have taught me something unequivocally valuable – I don’t want to wait around for something bad to happen.

When I first started my career, around the time I received the cancer news regarding my mom, I remember letting life happen to me. I would come up with these excuses on why it happened to me, and most of the time, I was the victim.

If only I had more money, if only I lived somewhere different, if only I was healthier, and the list goes on.

Today, I am not perfect by any stretch but I am much more proactive and positive with my mindset. That subtle shift has made a huge difference for me.

In this article, I plan to share with you a simple tool that I use. It has provided me a greater sense of purpose, value, and overall meaning in my life.

Start Shifting Your Mindset Today With These 6 Steps

It is broken down into 6 basic steps.

1.Start Journaling

Why: Daily journaling is scientifically linked to better mental health, increased productivity, reduced stress, improved clarity, and greater peace. By writing down your thoughts and feelings, you will start to gain a deeper understanding of yourself.

How: Grab a notebook - an old composition book, a fancy planner with a journaling section, whatever works best for you - and ask yourself, “What do you really want more than anything?” Oftentimes, what first comes to mind is not the answer. You might need to spend time on this one and write down everything that you think of. Is there one thing that really sticks for you?

2. Understand Your Barriers

Why: You can’t change what you’re unaware of. Identifying barriers—like limiting beliefs, fear of failure, societal expectations, or past experiences—brings them to light. This awareness is the first step to understanding why you think, feel, and act the way you do.

How: In the next section of your journal, ask yourself, “What is holding you back?” Try to get clear on where you are compared to where you want to be. Write whatever you need until you have a crystal clear image of what has gotten in your way in the past. This could include limiting beliefs about your true ability, societal pressures keeping you down, etc.

3. Create a PLAN

Why: Having a clear plan provides direction and purpose. It transforms your vision into actionable steps, helping you stay focused and motivated. A well-thought-out plan also reduces overwhelm by breaking down your goal into manageable tasks, making your journey toward purpose and meaning more attainable.

How: Start by identifying the specific outcome you want to achieve. Then, map out the steps required to get there. It’s perfectly okay to start small and build momentum gradually—what matters is that you take consistent action.

Ask yourself: What is one small action I can take today that moves me closer to my goal?

This could be as simple as researching, making a phone call, or setting aside dedicated time for focused work.

The key is to create a habit of progress, no matter how small the steps may seem. Momentum builds confidence, and each step forward brings you closer to your purpose.

4. Slay Your Dragons

Why: Your “dragons” are the fears, doubts, and obstacles that hold you back from pursuing your true purpose. Confronting them is essential because they block your potential and keep you stuck in your comfort zone.

By facing and overcoming these challenges, you build resilience, confidence, and personal growth, empowering you to live a life of meaning and fulfillment.

How: Remember those barriers we just journaled? It’s time to take intentional action to overcome them. This might involve learning a new skill, shifting your perspective, or stepping outside your comfort zone.

If you hit a road block, remember that doing hard things leads to growth. Embrace discomfort as a sign of progress, and consistently challenge yourself to rise above the obstacles. Each “dragon” you conquer brings you one step closer to living authentically and purposefully.

5. Develop a Daily Routine

Why: A daily routine creates consistency and momentum, ensuring that you make steady progress toward your goals. By incorporating purposeful habits into your day, you reduce decision fatigue and maintain focus on what truly matters. Consistent routines also help you build discipline and resilience, laying the foundation for long-term success and fulfillment.

How: Start by identifying one small habit that will move you closer to your goal. It could be as simple as dedicating 10 minutes each morning to reflection, planning, or skill development.

Remember, meaningful progress isn’t about making huge changes all at once—it’s about building small, incremental habits that compound over time.

Consistency is key.

Begin with manageable steps and gradually increase your commitment as the habit becomes second nature. For further guidance on building effective habits, consider reading Atomic Habits by James Clear, which offers powerful strategies for creating lasting change.

6. Remember that Life is a Gift

Why: Practicing gratitude has been consistently linked to increased happiness and improved well-being. Research indicates that individuals who regularly engage in gratitude exercises experience greater positive emotions, enhanced life satisfaction, and even better physical health.

For instance, a systematic review and meta-analysis demonstrated that participants who underwent gratitude interventions had greater feelings of gratitude (up to 4% higher scores), greater satisfaction with life (6.86% higher), better mental health (5.8% higher), and fewer symptoms of anxiety and depression (7.76% and 6.89% lower scores, respectively)

How: Begin each day by identifying and reflecting on things you're grateful for. This practice can be as simple as jotting down three positive experiences or aspects of your life each morning. Consistently dedicating time to recognize these positives can shift your focus from challenges to blessings, promoting a more positive mindset.

To further enrich your gratitude practice, consider sharing your reflections within supportive communities. For example, The Gratitude Zone, a section of New Wave Potential, offers a platform to post your daily gratitudes. Engaging with such communities can provide additional encouragement and inspiration.

Additionally, New Wave Potential offers a library of in-depth videos and free downloadable resources to support your journey toward consistent gratitude and personal growth.